Daily Jokes Gone Viral

Andreas from Munich

A: You look like a Volkswagen kind of guy. Andreas: Yah… I know…right?

Andy from Seattle

My comedy is a mix of hipster with neo-postmodern liberalism. If you don’t know who Ari Shapiro is, I can’t help you. If you don’t know what NPR stands for, you can’t help yourself.

I was a political science major in college.  If you don’t know who foucalt, then foucalt. I’ll let you figure that one out for yourself.

I saw a guy wearing a Duke baseball cap and a Chapel Hill T shirt.  I asked him what team he supports, to which he replied East Carolina. So…my next questiom is…what are you doing in Whole Foods?

So…How do I look? I swear…you guys are like my most handsome audience, and I’m not just saying that just cuzz. (Doing standup)

wholefoods

I Want A Hot Dog (Song)

You need a hot one I got one now take it and bend it
Shake it down, break it down, with me and a friend
Biggity bounce, slide, ride, Work that thing to the right
Push it down, push it up – boom, you dynamite
Lick it up like ice cream, homie you know it
It make me bow bow bow bow (Rocky Balboa)
See I lovin it when you snackin, baby just don’t stop
You could wobledee wobledee (drop drop it like it’s hot)
Beat it up and eat it up, love that’s yo meal
And if it ain’t from the ghetto, then ain’t no deal,
Ketchup, mustard, relish, be my guest.
Nothing compares to Chicago’s Best!

[Chorus:]
(A-What you need boy?) I need a hot dog
(A-What you want boy?) I want a hot dog